And Rose Cried...
Rose is a pretty tough girl. She doesn't like to show emotion too much, but today she did. Today she crawled up in my lap and cried.
It all started with a trip in the car, and a discussion Karmin was having with Rose in the back seat.
Karmin, "Aren't you excited that when you die, you get to go to heaven?"
Rose, "What! I'm going to die!" She said with a bit of a frightened, shocked tone.
Karmin, "Yes, we all will die someday. Aren't you going to heaven?" "Because you don't want to go to hell do you?" - "Mom, what happens when you go to hell?"
We have a brief discussion on what hell is. Karmin proceeds to persuade Rose that she needs to choose heaven, rather than hell. Rose by now is silent. I can tell she is crying. I pull the car over at a Pacific Pride gas station and tell her to unbuckle and come to me. She crawls into my lap, visibly upset. I asked her what was wrong. She said she doesn't want to go to hell, she wants to be with me & Karmin. We talk about how she has the choice, that all she needs to do is accept God's gift and ask Jesus to wash all her sins away. - She says, "But mom, I have a God book. Doesn't that mean I get to go to heaven?" (her God book is a notebook that she makes pictures of all the things God has made).
I ask her if she has ever done anything wrong. She explains that she got angry at Jesse this morning and hit him. Then I ask her about the time she dropped food under the table when she didn't want to eat it. - She acknowledged that too. And I reminded her that she hasn't been obeying me when I ask her not to pick up James. Yep, she concedes. So we discuss about asking Jesus to forgive her and wash her sins away, and that there can't be any sin in heaven. I ask her if she wants to ask him to forgive her. She says no.
I was a bit taken back, because she was so emotional about not going to heaven. So I ask her if she wants to repeat a prayer after me. She says she doesn't know. - I begin praying silently. I don't want to pressure her into praying and have her pray just because she is afraid of going to hell. I want her to understand how deep God's love is for us that He desires us to be with Him. That it isn't only based on the end result of making sure you don't go to hell. But because you have an encounter with Jesus & all you want is to be with Him.
Rose hasn't had that kind of experience with Jesus...yet. But she did decide that she didn't want to be in hell. She prayed a short prayer after me. Then she said, "Mom, do I have to ask for forgiveness every time I do something wrong?" (That's a tough question) Of course we need to ask for forgiveness, from God & from the people we may have wronged. But hasn't God washed ALL our sins away? Past, Present & Future? The bible says, "As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our sins from us" (I don't know the reference) But I didn't get into this theology. Instead I told her that we still need to acknowledge we did something wrong & try not to do it again, asking God to help us not to. Then I realized that I needed to ask her for forgiveness for yelling at her this morning. She smiled sweetly, hugged me and said, "Yes mom, I forgive you".
It was a beautiful moment with her. Her heart was so available and sensitive. A rare moment with my little Rose. She crawled back in her seat, and I cried. :)
It all started with a trip in the car, and a discussion Karmin was having with Rose in the back seat.
Karmin, "Aren't you excited that when you die, you get to go to heaven?"
Rose, "What! I'm going to die!" She said with a bit of a frightened, shocked tone.
Karmin, "Yes, we all will die someday. Aren't you going to heaven?" "Because you don't want to go to hell do you?" - "Mom, what happens when you go to hell?"
We have a brief discussion on what hell is. Karmin proceeds to persuade Rose that she needs to choose heaven, rather than hell. Rose by now is silent. I can tell she is crying. I pull the car over at a Pacific Pride gas station and tell her to unbuckle and come to me. She crawls into my lap, visibly upset. I asked her what was wrong. She said she doesn't want to go to hell, she wants to be with me & Karmin. We talk about how she has the choice, that all she needs to do is accept God's gift and ask Jesus to wash all her sins away. - She says, "But mom, I have a God book. Doesn't that mean I get to go to heaven?" (her God book is a notebook that she makes pictures of all the things God has made).
I ask her if she has ever done anything wrong. She explains that she got angry at Jesse this morning and hit him. Then I ask her about the time she dropped food under the table when she didn't want to eat it. - She acknowledged that too. And I reminded her that she hasn't been obeying me when I ask her not to pick up James. Yep, she concedes. So we discuss about asking Jesus to forgive her and wash her sins away, and that there can't be any sin in heaven. I ask her if she wants to ask him to forgive her. She says no.
I was a bit taken back, because she was so emotional about not going to heaven. So I ask her if she wants to repeat a prayer after me. She says she doesn't know. - I begin praying silently. I don't want to pressure her into praying and have her pray just because she is afraid of going to hell. I want her to understand how deep God's love is for us that He desires us to be with Him. That it isn't only based on the end result of making sure you don't go to hell. But because you have an encounter with Jesus & all you want is to be with Him.
Rose hasn't had that kind of experience with Jesus...yet. But she did decide that she didn't want to be in hell. She prayed a short prayer after me. Then she said, "Mom, do I have to ask for forgiveness every time I do something wrong?" (That's a tough question) Of course we need to ask for forgiveness, from God & from the people we may have wronged. But hasn't God washed ALL our sins away? Past, Present & Future? The bible says, "As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our sins from us" (I don't know the reference) But I didn't get into this theology. Instead I told her that we still need to acknowledge we did something wrong & try not to do it again, asking God to help us not to. Then I realized that I needed to ask her for forgiveness for yelling at her this morning. She smiled sweetly, hugged me and said, "Yes mom, I forgive you".
It was a beautiful moment with her. Her heart was so available and sensitive. A rare moment with my little Rose. She crawled back in her seat, and I cried. :)
..and I cried reading this! Thanks for sharing. Great wisdom displayed in your actions. I think it is interesting that her breakthrough is coming on the heels of getting through her obstinance and you personally working on winning her heart.
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